Before I started writing publicly I sent an article I wrote to a woman I knew who was a “writer”.
She was the first of many since then who would tell me that that my writing was crass and I shouldn’t put it out to the world, unless I changed it. That my work would be better if I didn’t swear. It would get to more people and be more effective in helping them transform. She told me that I use the word “fuck” when I don’t need to… that I’m far too intelligent to use slang and foul language in my writing.
I almost listened. I almost started writing and publishing under an alias.
Wow… thank god I didn’t. I would’ve been sending the same perpetual message we all get sent:
“It’s not safe to be who you are.”
So I said, “Fuck it.” And hit “publish” – as Mark Groves.
I’ve been told not to write about many subjects… religion, sex, marriage, divorce, circumcision… the list of the taboo is long. People’s sensitivities will always be there, but our willingness to speak truth has to be greater than our fear of not being loved by the people who experience it. And truth is fluid… much like our identities and beliefs. They will all change as we do.
Whatever your art or your dream is, let it be yours. Let your voice be found as you type/speak the words. Let your message from yesterday be your old truth and the one you share in this moment be an expression of what’s streaming through your heart right now.
And if you wanna swear, swear. Are there times when swearing isn’t appropriate? Sure. In those moments you and I shall edit our language… But let us refuse to edit who we are… because that would be us continuing to support a system that tells us to alter our truth in order to tow the line and be loved.
No longer are we limited by the geographic confounds of our often misguided and systemic-minded linear lineage. We can find our people. We can share what our hearts yearn to scream.
So here you are. On the edge of your truth. Often waiting for someone else to approve of your choices. But at the end of the day their opinion will never matter if you cannot lay your head to rest at night in love with your authentic and transparent self. What you think of you will always trump what they think of you. When you align you with you it causes cellular cohesion. That’s a peace “fitting in” can never give you.
In essence, Self-Expression = Freedom.